Today, I want to celebrate an amazing Relationship.For so long, I haven't looked back at the path I've travelled and I haven't taken a good look at my travelling Companion. For the last 3 years I have grown emotionally, mentally, socially and spiritually exponentially. I've done a lot of forgiving, and apparently forgetting, too. I've also learned that my parents baggage doesn't have to be my baggage, and that my baggage doesn't have to be my childrens'. This relationship with my other half has gone from passionate to deep profoundness as we learn what it means to communicate, love and respect one another.  Through the Grace of Jesus, I am being led down of path of mental and physical self awareness and making gradual life style changes.

Today, I celebrate my amazing Relationship with Jesus. We've come a long way. Amen!

I will always be moving, and I will never arrive. I am always evolving and I will never plateau. Yes, I was created this way, yet I live in a culture that strives for the final destination. They are sold on the once-I-arrive-I-will-be-happy song and dance, but we were created to be sojourners. We are voyagers of time and space, hence it makes sense to be called strangers in this world, called to be pilgrims. We were created to learn and expand and cycle through yet again. I am learning to say to myself each day, I will never arrive, I am travelling through. There is something poignant in that very thought. It makes me realize I don't have to rush through life. I don't have to panic about achieving the impossibles, because really I will never arrive. I will attain each level, but one must continue forward. 

And here is the interesting clash. Our humanity is attracted to motion, yet we want to bog down, yet when we bog down, restlessness causes us into motion again. War wages within. I believe we were created to constant evolution, we were created to ever learn. How else can one explain eternity? The idea of living forever causes some to panic, and it would if in the mind frame of the one who thinks they know everything or are comfortable in their ignorance. 

So, I was created to learn about the way I tick tock - even in my sinful nature. I am called to question my habits, but also how they are formed. But most of the time I need direction, guidance as to what questions I need to ask, where I need to look, what I need to focus on, and for this I need to go to the Master Designer. Jesus, thank You for being my travelling Companion through this time in Your Space. Amen. 

The Spirit of Worship

There's a lot going on in this cranium of mine, at the moment. My life style is perhaps the biggest thought in motion at the moment. I am thinking life style in context to my health - my eating and exercising habits. I am also thinking of my social and spiritual health - my lack of worship and fellowshipping. I have very much been drinking from broken cisterns (Jer. 2:13), for quite a long time now, however, the biggest purposeful change this year is my brain. Yes, I am changing my thought patterns.

I guess I am reorganizing my brain after a nature. I am trying to be purposeful in finding what works and what doesn't. I am trying to find what fits with me, rather than trial and error and just giving up. In the spiritual health spectre, I made a vital discovery this morning. Singing is so crucial to my worship experience; it is the one spectrum of worship that I love and find great pleasure in. Singing to Him calms my soul, brings peace to my being and ushers me into His presence. In other words, singing literary changes my attitude. My I-don't-care attitude has propelled me past my devotionals countless of times.

How is this all revelational? I haven't been singing in my personal time for quite sometime. I had lost my mini-hymn a year ago and never thought to buy a new hymn because I didn't think singing was relevant. But it is, and especially to me. You see, I grew up singing and playing hymns on the piano. Singing, especially hymns, is nostalgic. Singing those hymns is core to my worship experience because it's been there since the beginning of my self-realized relationship with God.

So this morning as I sang, tears began running down my face. Singing brought me back Home, and now singing is the key to my worship experience. Amen.